This week, my blog turned 6.
SIX!
I just can't even compute that.
Being me, I immediately set about reproaching myself for wasting so much time and letting my depression, lack of confidence and lack of focus etc get in the way of making this blog more successful. We all have our flaws and quirks and I have a powerful penchant for self-recrimination, but then I actually gave it an extra second's thought and realised what I have actually been through in the last 6 years and how miraculous it is that this blog still even exists. I also, with a dash of speed, stopped thinking about the last six years with any degree of depth, because frankly it’s all a bit too much to bear right now. I did, however, decide to give myself a break for a change and accept things as they are.
I am desperately trying to keep the blog regular and post at least once in a week but my depression is very strong right now, so I am trying not to put any pressure on myself; also there is a lot going on.
At the moment, I am attempting to parent two children, one of whom is three years old and likes to walk on the wild side. I think she is part little girl, part crazy-witchdoctor-pirate-banshee. The other one is nine months old and crawling everywhere and putting everything in her mouth. Today was Liora's last day at her preschool. Next week is half term (I've signed Liora up for swimming lessons) and then, at the end of next week, we are moving house. Again. I think this will be the 5th house move since I started the blog. (If I count every place we have lived since leaving South Africa, it's eye watering - this will be he 15th place we live in. I feel a bit sick now.).
Liora will be starting at a new preschool and then it's all about preparation for primary school (an hoping we get into the school we want) because she turns four in August so it's Primary school in September for my little girl. I cannot believe how time has flown by.
I suppose a little bit of light retrospection is not necessarily a bad thing, even the painful parts. You realise how much you have survived and grown. I feel like I have aged a thousand years and shed a million billion tears. Of heartbreak and sorrow, and immeasurable joy. I have lived and loved and lost and survived it all with the help of my husband and my little team Awesome Gorgeous.
As an aside, you also realise how much weight you have put on, how much makeup you have bought and how many clothes and shoes you have not bought.
I am amazed that through it all, my blog has remained and has become a part of my life. I was never very good at diary keeping, which explains the huge gaps in this blog, even though this has always been so much more than just an online diary minus the secrecy (there are also more real and difficult reasons for the gaps). I have learned so much about skincare and makeup in the last six years thanks to the blog and I am glad to report that in all this time my skin has not fared too badly.
This blog has basically made me stop ageing, so there is that.
I am mildly amused by the notion that I have tried and struggled so hard over the years to keep the blog focused on beauty, and now, in this moment of self reflection, when I am finally taking it really seriously, I want to evolve it just a little bit.
My next mission is to tackle all things that make you whole. Wait. No. that's not right. I simply want to explore all the bloggy bits that fall under the Lifestyle category and see what happens. I have a yearning to evolve out of the two shoes, jeans and black t-shirt uniform in which I live; not in an extravagant way, but I want to, well, dress like a grown up for a start.
Also, my mother-in-law is moving in with us soon, and she knows Things. So expect to see a whole series on How to Adult. It is, after all, all part of Becoming.
Happy Birthday Little Blog.
Thanks for my skin.
I love you!
SIX!
I just can't even compute that.
Being me, I immediately set about reproaching myself for wasting so much time and letting my depression, lack of confidence and lack of focus etc get in the way of making this blog more successful. We all have our flaws and quirks and I have a powerful penchant for self-recrimination, but then I actually gave it an extra second's thought and realised what I have actually been through in the last 6 years and how miraculous it is that this blog still even exists. I also, with a dash of speed, stopped thinking about the last six years with any degree of depth, because frankly it’s all a bit too much to bear right now. I did, however, decide to give myself a break for a change and accept things as they are.
I am desperately trying to keep the blog regular and post at least once in a week but my depression is very strong right now, so I am trying not to put any pressure on myself; also there is a lot going on.
At the moment, I am attempting to parent two children, one of whom is three years old and likes to walk on the wild side. I think she is part little girl, part crazy-witchdoctor-pirate-banshee. The other one is nine months old and crawling everywhere and putting everything in her mouth. Today was Liora's last day at her preschool. Next week is half term (I've signed Liora up for swimming lessons) and then, at the end of next week, we are moving house. Again. I think this will be the 5th house move since I started the blog. (If I count every place we have lived since leaving South Africa, it's eye watering - this will be he 15th place we live in. I feel a bit sick now.).
Liora will be starting at a new preschool and then it's all about preparation for primary school (an hoping we get into the school we want) because she turns four in August so it's Primary school in September for my little girl. I cannot believe how time has flown by.
I suppose a little bit of light retrospection is not necessarily a bad thing, even the painful parts. You realise how much you have survived and grown. I feel like I have aged a thousand years and shed a million billion tears. Of heartbreak and sorrow, and immeasurable joy. I have lived and loved and lost and survived it all with the help of my husband and my little team Awesome Gorgeous.
As an aside, you also realise how much weight you have put on, how much makeup you have bought and how many clothes and shoes you have not bought.
I am amazed that through it all, my blog has remained and has become a part of my life. I was never very good at diary keeping, which explains the huge gaps in this blog, even though this has always been so much more than just an online diary minus the secrecy (there are also more real and difficult reasons for the gaps). I have learned so much about skincare and makeup in the last six years thanks to the blog and I am glad to report that in all this time my skin has not fared too badly.
 |
| At the beginning |
 |
| Today. At 41 no makeup |
I am mildly amused by the notion that I have tried and struggled so hard over the years to keep the blog focused on beauty, and now, in this moment of self reflection, when I am finally taking it really seriously, I want to evolve it just a little bit.
My next mission is to tackle all things that make you whole. Wait. No. that's not right. I simply want to explore all the bloggy bits that fall under the Lifestyle category and see what happens. I have a yearning to evolve out of the two shoes, jeans and black t-shirt uniform in which I live; not in an extravagant way, but I want to, well, dress like a grown up for a start.
Also, my mother-in-law is moving in with us soon, and she knows Things. So expect to see a whole series on How to Adult. It is, after all, all part of Becoming.
Happy Birthday Little Blog.
Thanks for my skin.
I love you!